I’ve been debating about making this post. This blog has always been an outlet for me and after this crazy year I need all the “normalcy” I can find. So, here I am!
This year has wreaked havoc on my mental health. Most all my support interactions have taken place online in some shape or form. Winter depression kicked in when the weather turned colder.
And then I was blindsided by news about our local police chief. He’s being charged with some pretty horrific stuff. As soon as I heard the news my PTSD kicked in. I’d been doing so well in regards to my own trauma and then “wham.” I felt like a victim again. I had flashbacks to when I made my own report at that very police station. It brought back some of my trust issues and to add salt to the wound… my intense anxiety attacks returned.
I’ve been on increased medication for the past couple weeks. It’s finally starting to kick in but it’s just hard. I’ve been lonely, struggling and just feeling alone.
This is all still very raw to me but it’s a reminder of why I do what I do. Why I advocate for survivors and try to educate about sexual abuse/violence.
I also just want to say that I support the person who came forward. I see and believe her. She’s not alone.
That goes for all the survivors who are reading this blog. I stand with you in solidarity.