Open Letter To Advocate Kim

Dear Super Advocate,

I wanted to take the time to write you an open letter to thank you for how you helped lead me to where I am today.

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2018 was my year to empower, grow, inspire and thrive. And even though the year took a really weird turn, it still ended up being just that.

I want to use this as an opportunity to really see how it has all panned out in the way only life can do!

It was really hard adjusting to the first medication change. But, you were there for me. Encouraging me to feel the emotions, to get them out. It was so hard but so worth it!! Here’s a look back at that.

For the first time in years I felt emotions. Real emotions. Ugly emotions. Anger. Sadness. You name it. I felt it. And, that’s when I decided to make the police report. To name him for what he is. To find some kind of closure by taking my life back!

I was facing things and kicking butt, left and right, with you by my side. I was not prepared for the turn my life would take. I was not prepared for how I would react when I got the call back from the detective about my case. It knocked me on my butt, hard!

To add salt to the wound, you went on vacation to come back and blindside me again by giving your two weeks notice at your job. That is when everything fell apart. I didn’t think I could do it without you. I was so attached to you because of everything we went through together (especially this year!) You weren’t supposed to leave. That wasn’t a part of my plans.

It has turned out to be a good thing. I still miss you terribly (ask anyone!!) but your leaving forced me to become more dependent, to realize my recovery and journey wasn’t based on you being there by my side. That I had it in me all along.

Yes, the past few months have really sucked for me. But, this year I have definitely empowered (others) , grown, inspired (others) and thrived. How dare you leave but thank you for that gift!!! 🙂

I hope if you end up seeing this, and that you will say hi (you don’t have to leave a name or e-mail address!!)

Thank you for everything you taught me, especially how to grow without you.

Love always, Super Butterfly Girl

PS. I now know that I want to become a shelter advocate and follow in your footsteps.

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